The power of small and simple
things is an amazing phenomenon when one really takes time to consider their effects. I recently saw this quote on a picture of The
Great Wall of China. What an amazing
wonder that wall is. Who could have
imagined the breadth of it’s magnitude when it was first begun? Our own lives are like a brick wall. When we use small acts of kindness towards
anyone, especially our loved ones, the outcome and magnitude can be far grander
than we ever imagined. The same could be
said of negative sentiments, but who would seek to begin such a wall of
negativity if they could see even half way where it would lead. A wall of positive sentiments can build
strong marriages and families, brick by brick.
This week I have studied a couple
of chapters in Gottman’s book, “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work”
on turning toward our loved ones, instead of away from them. Gottman teaches that the basics of this idea
are that each of us sends bids for connection, or support. When we receive a “bid” from our spouse, we
can respond by simply being aware, says Gottman (p.89). “Turning toward operates under a law of
positive feedback”, he continues. We can
build trust and connect with one another in tiny ways that reach far beyond
what it seems a small act or response could…..just like placing one brick on
the wall.
A beautiful scripture from my
churches modern day scriptures, the Doctrine and Covenants, was also shared
with us this week D&C 64:33 "Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing,
for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things
proceedeth that which is great." What a great promise to
continue to lay the foundation to a great marriage by the small and simple
things, turning towards, prioritizing our spouse, sharing an inside joke, or
simply reaching out to hold a hand.
These small acts can build a wall that is strong and protecting from the
weather and storms life can bring.
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